August 25, 2006
Confirmed: A Maxi Pad is Not a Fetus
Warning: This post could be distressing because we're mentioning feminine hygiene products and fetuses. (We waited until after lunch to post it!) But it's really funny-bizarre, so it's up to you.
Yesterday, we heard that there had been a fetus found on the grounds of a Queens golf course and the police were investigating the matter. Thanks to the NY Sun, we now know what happened: After a golfer at Forest Park Golf Club saw something "suspcious" in the restroom, employees took a look and called 911, saying that a fetus was found. So authorities responded - cops on the ground, an NYPD chopper, the K-9 unit, the ME's office - in order to find the mother who was presumably on the run. A few hours later, it was discovered that the fetus was not a fetus after all but a sanitary napkin. Now, we don't want to think too much about how a maxi pad could be mistaken for a fetus, and even though an employee told the Sun, "Everyone thought it was a fetus," blood does not a fetus make!
The Parks Department told the Sun, "It's one of those odd but true stories. I'm not really sure how she thought that, but the appropriate actions were taken given the concern." Chalk this one up to watching a little too much Law & Order: Special Victims Unit!
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Soon the authorities will be outlawing periods as reckless abandonment of an unborn child.
That is hysterical. Comedy gold.
Geez, even Jake had more sense than to put his moniker to this story.
At least, the woman did the right thing and not try to flush it down the toilet.
I'm tired of people flushing their maxis down the toilet causing a overflow if I try and flush it.
What made her think it was a fetus? First hand experience? I would think the tell tale sign is the umbilical cord.
More info than we need to know....
if this wasn't so funny it would be very sad.. how in the hell does someone first of all not see a diffence between a fetus and a pad.. especially a woman.. second even if it was a fetus if it was the size of a pad it would be way to small to survive anyway so why in the hell are they wasting time look for someone who simply miscarried.. i dont belive that is a crime yet..
Too much coke a fetus make...